Hi, I'm Ethan Fixell.
Remember when, last week, I published that “definitive, objective, indisputable list of the best heavy metal band from every U.S. state”? Well, it turns out that if you make an “indisputable” proclamation, people will go ahead and dispute it anyway. How rude!
Over the weekend, Cody Davis of Metal Injection actually wrote a rebuttal to my Metal Map. While Davis and I seem to agree on the winners of about 20 states, he did have alternate picks for the rest of my selections. And though I appreciate the work he put into his piece (and think he’s a great metal writer in general, too) I couldn’t stop myself from responding to Mr. Davis, and explain why most of his amendments are, quite simply, wrong.
ARIZONA
Kerrang!: Flotsam & Jetsam
Metal Injection: Alice Cooper
Alice Cooper is undeniably one of the most essential American rock musicians / bands of all time – setting the stage for countless metal acts to come. But we can’t possibly categorize Alice Cooper as “metal.” Peerless and incredible, sure – but “proto-metal” at best.
ARKANSAS
Kerrang!: Pallbearer
Metal Injection: Rwake
True, Rwake is a solid band – one that influenced Pallbearer quite a bit, actually. But as Davis himself admits, “tenure doesn’t imply being the best.” Pallbearer would build upon Rwake’s sludgy, doomy sound and made something even better.
COLORADO
Kerrang!: Cephalic Carnage
Metal Injection: Primitive Man
As Davis also says, “Colorado offers a wealth of riches when it comes to metal bands.” And while Primitive Man is great, I would personally sooner give Colorado to Khemmis, Blood Incantation, or Allegaeon than I would to Primitive Man.
ILLINOIS
Kerrang!: Ministry
Metal Injection: Pelican
First of all, I reject the assertion that Ministry “hasn’t been good since 1992.” Filth Pig (1996) and The Last Sucker (2007) are among the best of Ministry’s discography. I, too, love Pelican, but they’re not even a shred as influential as Ministry has been -- and the band has just as many weak spots in its discography, relatively speaking.
KANSAS
Kerrang!: Origin
Metal Injection: Manilla Road
I’m almost willing to simply give this one to Davis. Manilla Road is unquestionably a more “important” band, with plenty of classic releases over the last 40 years. But I simply like Origin a hell of a lot more. Sue me!
LOUISIANA
Kerrang!: Eyehategod
Cody: Thou
Now, here’s where Davis starts to go off the reservation. Thou is “better” than Eyehategod? What’s next? Is he going to try to convince me that Falls of Rauros is better than Ogre?
MAINE
Kerrang!: Ogre
Metal Injection: Falls of Rauros
Damn it! Let’s ask any Portlander to choose between the two. Not to take anything away from Falls, but Ogre is some legit, OG local shit that sounds like a crappy Portland bar at 1 in the morning (in the best possible way). Gotta give respect where it’s due.
MARYLAND
Kerrang!: Clutch
Metal Injection: Dying Fetus
Okay, I’m gonna be honest here: I like Dying Fetus more than Clutch. And I do think they’re more metal. I only changed my pick because of how passionately some of the guys in the Kerrang! office disagreed with me about it. Can I come work with you, instead?