This album also marks their first since the passing of drummer Jamie Gowers in 2024. By working through grief and going to therapy, a prominent theme that Charlie wanted to spotlight is that it’s okay to be unsure about things, feel conflicted, and have the courage to openly admit it. FIND ANOTHER WAY explores just that.
“It’s very much about fated paths,” she says. “Are things drawn out for us or can they change? When I was writing the track, I watched Donnie Darko for the first time. On the surface it’s a teen horror flick, but it’s actually a story about tangent universes. Destined paths have been a big thing for me, and battling with that concept. I still don’t really know where I sit on it, and that’s okay. That’s such a big thing I’m an advocate for: it’s okay to not know. Before Jamie passed, I [believed] things were supposed to happen when they’re supposed to happen, and now I don’t feel that way.”
The grief of Jamie’s passing felt like an electric shock. As Everything Unfolds lost a bandmate and a friend, and for Charlie, she lost her partner too. Grief looks completely different for everyone, and she didn’t find it helpful to sit still. The surviving members banded together and found comfort through music. It was challenging, and some days really fucking sucked, but there was a shared sense among them that this is what they needed to do.
“We took some time to go away and think about it, we even discussed it with [Jamie’s] parents. This wasn’t a decision that we made lightly,” Charlie shares. “There was an element of, ‘If we let those demos just sit and waste, what’s been the point in all this?’ We felt like if we get through this and we feel bad at the end of it, we can say that we tried.
“I think my knowledge seeking and curiosity is what sent me [this] way,” she continues. “I didn’t find any help in sitting in my own grief.” All the while, she also leaned on friends who had also experienced loss. “Sam Kubrick from Shields was a great [help], because they lost their guitarist, George [Christie]. I could bounce things off them and go, ‘I don’t know how I feel about this,’ or, ‘Where were you at this point?’”
Due to the parasocial toxicity that breeds on social media, Charlie found herself feeling scared about how people would form opinions or make assumptions about As Everything Unfolds’ decision to continue. But behind the scenes, she was taking time off her job as a music teacher, and was in therapy “pretty much every single day”.
“I was actually really terrified about how people would perceive me and my grief, because he passed away in August and then we were on tour in November,” she recalls. “I remember saying to my therapist, ‘I’m so scared that people are going to judge me.’ She was like, ‘What difference does it make? Whether people are saying those things or not, does that change how you’re grieving?’
“Grief is such a weird thing. Don’t ever tell somebody in grief how they should behave. Some people go straight back to work; some people take a year or five years off. There is no right way to do it.”